:: just killing time ::

:: we're all safe up here | visit my dreamland! | yo! ::

:: Saturday, April 13, 2002 ::

yesterday i went to class AND work. like a good girl. then i took shane to get his argyle socks and godiva chocolate and este lauder beauty regiment, and he got me some sandals w/ flair. we had dinner at cadillac cafe, and i tried the 'savory' pumpkin soup to go w/ my usual sandwich. cuz i like the word savory. we came back and wanted to park right outside our building. but there was this stupid girl trying to park her car and doing the whole uturn in the middle of the residential street thing. turn, stop, back up, stop forward, turn more stop backup. ridiculous. then she finally parks and her boy was there standing next to the car all in my way. she was parked too much into the spot in front of her but i chanced it. right as she walked off i went for that spot but i hit her car a little backing up. as i did, i realized it and started to pull forward and realized also that she was watching still. and instead of getting out, i just kept pulling forward. like nothing happened. hehe and i pulled forward all the way to the corner, turned, and got a spot on the next street. shane couldnt' believe i had (a) hit the car while the owner was still watching and (b) slowly cruised away from the scene of the crime instead of burning rubber. i guess i was kinda pretending it hadn't happened. : ) she was stupid though, and it didn't scratch her car i'm sure. i hit the license plate i think. but the look on her face was priceless. ok i'm not the best at parallel parking but her parking job sure didnt' make it easy...
when we came back there was a party at shane's party, all program board people. we played queens(?), a drinking game w/ cards, and sang and danced. it was fun! we went by another party to meet a guy i used to date from my old job. he is about five years older than me but acts about ten younger. and he has fleas. well i don't know but i assume (any guy w/ a popular name gets a second name, so he is flea matt, to avoid confusion. hence white shane/asian shane and danbaz/dan riley). anyways, he has been calling an awful lot, more and more as time goes on. and i am not sure why. but sometimes he comes by and i attempt to set him up w/ other girls, never very successfully. we all stopped by dusty's party for dave's 21st bday, where i scored a carrot. dusty was making elk pie or something, but my crew was too rambunctious(?) for that chill party. we did return at around 4 am to catch the last half of mallrats and pass out for a bit on the furniture, and i got a good whiff of the dead carcass that they cooked up. not pretty. i mean i'm into some meat but that was stanky.

there was a crisis at one point during the night. everyone was in tears. everyone but me. weird huh? i cried during the ugly duckling, it was my first real PMS experience in middle school. i didn't know why i was crying so much, turns out i was just getting a taste of the rest of my life. anyways I AM THE ONE PMSing, but i wasn't crying. i maintain composure during crises, but i usually take on a lot of emotional stress during and after that just explodes at some point. so it all comes back to me. this is just a strange time for everyone around me, we are all at the point where we should be moving on, away from school, changing our lives that have become so normal and comfortable over the past four years. it isn't manifesting so much where we all realize how lost we are, but more like we are having a lot of interpersonal turmoil, people are upset at other people, and i think it is more about that need for stability and putting too much energy into our friendships that we feel are on the line as we are leaving. none of us are leaving right now, but we are all kinda lost and unsure of where we want to go and what we want to do next. and we want to know who will be there when we move on to the next level. or will we be alone again, having to start over?

today was started off by a troubling email and a paralyzing yet strangely stabillizing phone call. this kinda showed me why i really avoid calling people long distance. this person seemed really distant, w/ a far away voice. like a completely different person. i guess when you let feelings start building up a certain way, even when you hear the person's voice things may have turned... i've gone four years without calling too many people back home, cuz i want things to be the same when i return as when i left, as i may have noted before. i need this continuity, and i rely on this heavily when i think about my friends far away. some of my friends at home are very upset when i say i dont want to come back. but coming back stresses me out, my mom stresses me out, and if i dont stay on my grandma's couch (my mom lives w/ her) then where would i go? i hate inviting myself to people's houses. i want people to visit here but no one can afford it, and they all have their own lives. and i am the one who left, so it is assumed that i should be the one coming back. but when i do go back i feel wonderful, the void is filled, and i realize i am still loved and i still have these wonderful connections. i want to stay and build them back up but i am just there long enough to get a taste of what i was missing and then i'm back here. a week isn't long enough but i dont think i could stay at my grandma's for longer. i can't shower there, that house is gross, so i have to find other places, and it's really unpleasant... anyhow, i feel like the conversation ended ok w/ this friend of mine, even if i still feel kind of betrayed emotionally. i know it's just me. i let myself believe in something that i had no right to. but i think just as all friendships happen, when i see that person again things will fall back into place and somehow work out for us both.

check this out. according to them, i need to be more careful when i'm out there 'meeting girls' cuz i didnt' do so well on the test...

i have a lot more to tell you but shane's dad is taking us to swinger's w/ shaun, for a late dinner. so free food, see ya later!
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 10:24 PM [+] ::
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today started out ok, but it just went downhill. i had a lot of hopes for this day, and i think that was my problem. four things i really wanted to happen, and none of them did.
1. i wanted to get away from campus, and take a friend to do his shopping someplace that i would not be able to spend money but i would get to try stuff on. dress up is fun, i love trying on formals, and big fancy jacket! mmm... i also wanted to take him to dinner at a place i have not been to for a long time.
instead i got off work and he was off w/ other people eating fast food. so i just gave up on that, and moved on to my next goal.

2. i really wanted ice cream today. i was thinking B&R or DQ. being lactose 'sensitive', i usually dont ever eat ice cream. but at times like this, i get a HUGE craving. this one has gone on for a few days and i was really ready for it tonight. i even got there, and picked out exactly what i wanted. the heartbreak healer (dark chocolate w/ lonely hearts) and oregon blackberry double sundae w/ whipped cream and sprinkles mmm. but it turned out they didn't take card and i have NO cash whatsoever right now.
at this point i remembered how sad i felt coming home to find that my friend had left right when we were supposed to go shopping, so i felt even more left out, and just wanted to go sit at my desk. so i did and i finally found some people that seemed eager to hang w/ me. we got M&M mcflurries (mine had chocolate syrup on top mmmm), and then i wanted to get back to plan 3 but it wasn't popular w/ anyone else so they mostly went home.

3. i wanted to party. i wanted to go dance and keep my mind off things which cannot be changed for now.
instead i sat on a friend's bed reading for a class as he ignored me to type on aim. my other 'friends' were in the frontroom playing cards, and none of them would let me play, or start a game that i could join in. that was incredibly lame.

4. i was waiting for something very specific to happen.
i know, i should not have been waiting. but i guess i am still waiting, as i am still awake. but i know it is silly to do this to myself. i am just having one of those lonely days where i have really not been alone for the majority of the day but i feel like i am in some titanium bubble that no one cares to approach. i guess it looks militaristic. but to me it's just cold and lonely, and i dont see why it's such a threat.

i want to go home. i wish i had one.
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 3:46 AM [+] ::
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what the....????

If I were a wine I would be...


This quiz was created by Krazy K. Take it here!

:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 2:37 AM [+] ::
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woop woop so we have a summer place BEHIND the house i thought it was, but this apartment is pretty nice, i have been in it before. and terie seems to have found an alternative to our 10person/6bedroom, an even CHEAPER and equally new 6person/6bedroom! cross your fingers for me, cuz if this works out we will be throwing some SWEET parties and you are all invited!! : ) i hate getting my nopes up for awesome things like this though, but hey what else can i do?
i went to work again today. another $30 coming to me. this work thing is beginning to grow on me. i got a discount pass for hurricane harbor/magic mountain from a friend at work (she also gave me her aol screen name - yay!). for up to SIX people! yay! i love water parks the most. especially when it's hot.
i vow to get more sun on my skin this summer. i will still wear sunscreen daily on my face, but my legs were barely exposed at all last summer. i look like a corpse! i am NOT working 40+ hours a week, inside all day long, too tired to enjoy my days off. NO WAY!!! even if i have to eat top ramen every day (but i wont, i have magical luck when it comes to finding food and food money). anyways, time to go eat!!!! mmm : )
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 6:45 PM [+] ::
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yesterday i forgot to blog! well i was gone most of the day (surprisingly). like i said, my life is picking up again. or i am picking up. something like that....
well yesterday i went to BOTH my classes and somehow managed to get a tiny nap in after lunch at the galen center w/ steph, shane, and terie. i also ran into dusty, and he told me he was going to be living in the crappy 9 bedroom house ian and i looked at first. the one next to the drug dealer (no really, he is the drug dealer). i am glad we didn't go for that one but it would have been nice to have a place lined up, set in stone. hopefully we get this house saturday, if not i dont know what we'll do. for the summer we are supposedly staying in the 'cinema house' if all goes well at terie's meeting today. that would be fun times playing 'clue' out on the porch sippin lemonade.... we watched the 'yellow submarine' in my beatles class, i LOVE that movie. it is so absolutely ridiculous. my brother watched it when he visited last spring and he loved it, too, so i know it's not just cuz of the psychadelic aspects. it is just funny and nonsensical! ---weird i was talking to danbaz and he just typed 'nonsensical' on an IM after i wrote that!---
after the movie, i stopped by jordan's to bitch at him. always good fun. until i pop a cap. then i bust-ass to beverly connection to get my shop on w/ ian at the center before the movie. we were sneaking past my old work, it was so sad. i wanted to stop by and say 'hi' but i dont know if the manager was around and i didn't want to see him. : (
i got myself two new shirts for summer (one of which is a cute tanktop. i need cute tanktops if i am gonna be a summer girl). then ian (aka internparamount) took us over to the screening of 'changing lanes' which i must say was not so bad. i actually liked it cuz the ending was a bit more realistic than most i've seen. not that the movie was too realistic at all but i like the idea. and it was about two stories with creative transitions between scenes. i am not a ben affleck fan but the movie was at least entertaining, definitely worth the free ticket, parking validation, and popcorn and mr. pibb (courtesy of paramount!). i love free stuff.
later i went to dinner w/ everyone but jordan (he turned me down! argh) and found out that peter was thinking about ME when he did something i am not going to explain - but it was kinda gross and weird. i am still calling into kscr every now and then requesting whitney, but since they don't have it i usually say 'just play me something by a diva, i need to hear diva music' haha.
i love jujyfruits. my teeth, however, may not appreciate them.
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 12:46 PM [+] ::
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i am talking to danbaz about quitting smoking i kinda feel like i am quitting something, cuz i had a simliar experience to him today. maybe it was i quit sitting in front of my computer and started moving around a lot...
when i was skating and feeling so free, it was like a flood of emotions just came and overpowered me. i started to cry a little, while skating, cuz it felt so amazingly open and vulnerable to be flying through the air. it let me feel lonely and so incredibly peaceful and excited all at once... very very strange when emotions come all at once, and for no obvious reason. but writing it out doesn't do it justice. it was so much more. i have a sense of security but it may be completely based on my own inner fantasies that have kept me company my whole life. i am confident in something that logically i should find disheartening. i finally believe in something that is bigger than me. it i enough to make me happier than i've ever felt, and simultaneously reminds me of the many years i had waited for this feeling and felt so hopeless about. and i have kind of accepted that i do want to let myself be open to this feeling, and to stop trying to second-guess myself and everyone around me. but it may be too late, and that is the scariest feeling of all.
i feel so happy lately and i keep worrying myself that somehow i'll realize why i am so happy and how wrong that is and the rug will get swept out from underneath me. i wish i wasn't always so overanalytical and insecure, but i pick up these things that scare me back into old patterns and it all starts over again...
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 3:49 AM [+] ::
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it sucks when the only two people you can ever hang out with (especially at this time of night) are hanging out w/ the most obnoxious person i can think of. i have so much energy and i really didn't want to be home right now, cuz my mind is moving fast, and i'm thinking about something pretty unpleasant right now. i wish i could skate longer but i am a big wuss and 40 min made my legs start to feel like jelly, mostly cuz of all the brick vibrations on campus... i am trying to resist writing an email to someone because i think it would be a bad idea but sitting at my computer is just too tempting. where else can i go in this fucking apartment. grrrrr.... GRRRR.... i am definitely not talking to either of my 'friends' tomorrow cuz every time they hang out w/ this obnoxious person i kinda respect them less, or at least see them in a very unflattering light. i hate seeing people who flock to a girl at her every whim when that same girl obviously doesn't give a shit about them. i had an old roommate who would be so phony just like that, where she would only be a friend to anyone if she was single. then as soon as she got a guy (and most likely she met him through me or another friend) she would forget about the rest of the world until she was single again. sorry that doesn't mean you are a friend, that means she is bored and it is convenient. she needs SOMEONE to keep her occupied until she finds what she is looking for. like filler. i don't wanna be filler, i am a WHOLE PIE! i may as well join a sorority if i am gonna have to be around flakey, annoying girls! (ouch sorry to offend anyone 'greek' but it ain't my thang).
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 2:51 AM [+] ::
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jordan took us to mccormick's and schmick's tonight for the $1.95 teryaki cheeseburgers and fries! mmmm.... he was pretty damn annoying though. i stole two rolls of TP for the shane household after we came back, i spent a while writing addresses on grad announcement envelopes in red pen, as i had been doing before we left, and then got anxious from checking my email too often. so i went rollerblading for 40 min. i really like skating on campus at night alone, w/ my headphones on. i really truly feel freedom, like i am the only one on the entire planet and i can do whatever i want and feel however i want....
then i stopped by to see a friend upstairs. the sprinkler outside his apartment was blowing water up to the third floor! haha the amount of water this school wastes is INSANE! well he had a present for me - he had gotten me TOOL's cd/dvd boxed set, SALIVAL, and it was up there waiting for me for god knows how long!!! i am sooo excited, like its' christmas or something, cuz I LOVE TOOL and their videos are awesome!

someone told me my blog is scandalous. i try my best.
however, i still don't see where i said that jordan is gay. maybe someone is reading between the lines...
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 2:34 AM [+] ::
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i still dont know why i had a dream about brad pitt, or why he was rhasta. or why i was impressing the hot guy w/ my gun. but i dont think it was about either of them, i think it was about me wanting to be in the FBI. ? good idea huh? meanwhile i'll keep my cover job at the daycare. i went back to work there for the first time in like a year! i kept feeling like i had so much more to do cuz i am used to my coffee superviser job that was sooo strenuous. WHAT WAS I THINKING??? well i only made $23 but that was for like 3 hours of sitting around playing w/ babies! argh i dont care as much about the money, i just hate quitting things. the only reason i quit the daycare was cuz i didn't have summer workstudy last year. then the coffee bean gave me my promotion in two months and i had made a lot of friends there (workers and customers). but the ladies at work are like family, and today i left w/ a cinnamon raisin bagel and a mcdonald's apple pie. THAT is a job. fun and cozy and happy. the way my coffee job was only one hour per shift, or on really really slow nights...
anywho, today was nice, the weather was pretty good and shane and i went to meet peter on campus for lunch. on the way we ran into jordan who tagged along and made us buy him food w/ peter's discretionary. barry was also there, and i kinda like having him around sometimes cuz he always seems so amused by me. i used to think he didn't like me back in the satellite show days cuz i never seem to take much seriously. but he always did come to my parties "with beer". carl's jr chicken strips are pretty good as far as fast-food chicken goes! i like eating outside carl's on a nice sunny day w/ my friends : ) and none of the birds even pooped on us!
one time last summer, ian and i were at the beach and all of the sudden he says "oh...my...god", and as we were both kinda laying there w/ magazines i just looked to the side to see what he was looking at. i said "what does that guy go to our school? do you know him? WHAT?" and he just stares at me, completely mortified. "WHAT?" "A BIRD... POOPED.... ON MY BACK"
"HAHAHAHHAHA" i was laughing soo hard i couldn't even look. when i finally got myself together to look.... well.. let's just say i had never seen such a huge bird bomb in my life. it was splattered all over his back. i tried to maintain composure and clean it up for him but i was still laughing to the point of tears. i finally grabbed the shirt he had been wearing (which was sadly NEXT to him not ON him) and i wiped his back off w/ it. then i rolled it up and put it to the side and told him to go to the water and wash off. when he came back the first thing i said was "so, how did it feel?" and he said "well it was kinda like a big THUD and then it was all warm, then it started getting cold.... and hard" hahahaha. anyways, that is IAN'S lesson learned the hard way - shane and i had ALWAYS told him not to feed those birds at the beach, those dirty seagulls... and now he knows why!
this summer i may be going to chicago on my way out of the country. tickets are soo cheap on american for may! woop woop! i haven't seen a'ndrea in FOREVER. honestly. and i want to also see my other USC girl, gilu! she is in israel, and while i may not go there i will meet her in italy or something : ) and we'll eat chocolate til the cows (that's us) come home!
why did all my usc girls go so far away from me : (
gotta go, shane needs to drop off the kids and he's coming here get a roll of TP! hehe too much info huh?
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 6:23 PM [+] ::
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weird, my blogs from last night were all sitting here unpublished. hmm hehe
i ust wke up from a dream about rhasta brad pitt an the 'hot guy'. it wasn't anything about anyone being hot so much as it was about this abandoned plot of land in the middle of a city. like a field w/ a brick wall around it and trees, some hills. we were all three playing a grenade game. my dad an my sister were somehow in involved. my favorite part was planting an explosive just past the tree, then shotting another one from the other side of the field to blow it up, and that really impressed the 'hot guy'. the guns we used were like shot guns only they had some sort of proximity mine ammo. ok that is enough for now, this doesn't make ANY sense to any of you.
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 11:34 AM [+] ::
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second star to the right, and straight on til morning.
i'm going to disneyland!
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 2:50 AM [+] ::
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peter fucked up. that's it, he's outta the band. I MADE YOU! I CAN BREAK YOU!!!
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 2:05 AM [+] ::
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me and my crew... we belong on star search.
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 2:03 AM [+] ::
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jordan and i had our hearts broken by the two men in our lives, as they invited us to come visit and then proceeded to IGNORE US. shitey. so we went to ralph's for goods (i ended up w/ some weird collection of unnecessary products, including butter toffee peanuts?) and then to wait for shane. stephanie appeared w/ shane and we all went to cafe 50s (without the 'men') and had some good food as usual. we also played a little UNO but none of us really got anywhere. on the way home we were circling troy and moving outwards for a parking spot, and all of the sudden our FAVORITE *whitney* song came on. we started belting out our dramatic operatics until the song sadly faded out. i WILL go to work tomorrow. just you wait.
i miss gilu, and i finally got an email from her!!! and another and another! yay! shane and i were just reminiscing of when we used to go to her swanky pad at bunker towers. we ate pizza by the pool and then had ice cream and sorbet all night long while attempting to watch 'what lies beneath'. i think i was the only one who stayed awake, but i also made the most headway w/ the ice cream : )
phu also emailed me, haven't seen her in a while. i can be hard to get away of, don't ask me why. i just get kinda reclusive, and other times i'm lazy. so if you are one of the people i never call back, then just come and get me. i promise i won't kick and scream too much. take me somewhere fancy schmancy! maybe i'll put out! hehe jk...
shane is sooo cute. especially when he's wrapped up in his *tragic* goth blanket from his shortlived days as an urban outfitter.
as many times as i have heard 'yesterday' by the beatles, i still get watery eyes when i hear it, especially as mccartney gets to his upper range... sooo sad. i have a copy of an early take and it was even more emotional, so raw. i am gonna cry just thinking... ok change songs...
did i ever mention i love stevie wonder? and the supremes? i'm a sentimental fool.
"each time you speak to me, i hear a tender rhapsody of love... a thousand violins fill the air - whenever you are near i hear a symphony, play sweet and tenderly, every time your lips meet mine. you bring a joy within, don't let this feeling end, let it go on and on."
"i musta been insane, i lied and said mama died in spain - i'm livin in shame, mama i miss you."


"back to the bin...."
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 1:45 AM [+] ::
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it's a miracle! i performed a miracle! i'm a genius!
so i have an interview w/ the rest of my ragtag crew (ten total) to interview saturday for this house we want. the lady asked how many boys and girls and she seemed kinda surprised. i really dont think its such a big deal though. i am used to these guys. i wish sarah and a'ndrea and rachel could come and start a house w/ me - a genuine lillith fair of a house. i'd be feelin it. my sister too! she actually just called me for my credit info cuz she wants to rent a 3bedroom/1.5bath in bellingham for $800/mos. LA RENT SUCKS btw, that is like a one bedroom here. a shitty one in a crappy neighborhood! anywho, why does my whole family try to use MY credit. i work HARD to get good credit and their partaking is kinda... risky... my dad tries to use mine all the time for stuff like cars, etc. i bet he had lots of stuff that he leased w/ my credit somehow. he keeps asking for my soc sec #. pretty shady. my sister also told me that my dad and his girlfriend are coke addicts. all of the 'big babies' in seattle are also into it (those are his persian friends that i've known since i was a kid, we used to call them that cuz they were all bachelors for so long). there is this huge drug related drama right now up there, with a childhood friend of mine and 'the dealer', but i guess he just didn't know how much his dad was already into it.
i had no idea my dad was doing this. i couldn't tell. i mean i knew he used to, that was pretty obvious behaviorally. but not now. but his girlfriend has been acting funny. i thought it was just cuz she was an aries... and they are both moody. my dad is always pretty explosive but i'd chalked it up to his personality! grr i still want to think my sister is just paranoid but she said my dad's girlfriend got a bloody nose after having headaches last time they saw her. i mean it could have been the climate change, right? i have been exposed to so many users and addicts yet i am really good at hiding off in my own fantasy world and turning my head to things that i just don't want to see. i do believe it took me a few years to realize my mom was an alcoholic. and that should have been hard to miss. the human subconscious is an amazing thing, and mine works overtime to protect my fragile ego! : P
jessica simpson is boring.
"i'd love to turn you on...."
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 7:47 PM [+] ::
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i am sure anyone at usc has had (or will have) some sort of bureaucratic BS during one of their four years at USC. but i feel like i've had more than my share. this morning i wake up to register, hoping to go BACK to sleep asap, but noooo my registration has a magical hold that it never had before. so i had to sit through phonecalls and transfers and holdmusic. to get some guy who says to try again tomorrow, and finally now it is working. good thing i didn't wait til tomorrow like the ass said. and somebody LIED to me when they said you didn't have to get clearance to take italian 1. my roommate is now up, which means falling back asleep will be hell, jordan already called and came by and now gabe says he'll be by BEFORE NOON! i lost my ethernet connection and had to change jacks. which meant crawling under my bed. haha this day already sucks.

btw, can anyone tell me why every class i want is offered from 2-3:30 every M/W next semester? i can't possibly be in FOUR PLACES AT ONCE!!! grrrrr : P
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 10:05 AM [+] ::
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another night wasted. at least we now have well over 10 people who want to live in our house. but i didn't do any studying today. i went to kscr w/ ian (who was eating marigolds) and ended up in terie's gocart flying across campus. we went to trojan grounds for shane and terie, starbucks for jordan, then back to shane's. i set up my schedule to register tomorrow, and if i get the classes i will tell you what they are. i should if i actually wake up in time. and they are all LAS, thanks to my major requirements... grrr... should be some fun though! and i am doing it all online thanks to this new spiffy program where we don't have to flip through a book or scribble down our week schedule! i watched (most of) joyluck club for the first time tonight. i liked it! it was really cute and sappy but it was the type of movie that gets you thinking about your own life and your interpersonal relationships. it makes you want to be a better person! well if you let it get inside your head like i obviously did. shane seemed to like it a lot so i should have watched it sooner, i guess i don't go out of my way to find a movie that will make me cry, but this one kinda fell into my lap. eh. speaking of sappy and cute, i got a postcard today (ok i'm speaking on sunday, but technically it came in the mail saturday, i just forgot to check). it was from helsinki, and it's a picture of boats that jordan says resembles portland. okeee... it was the hugest postcard i have ever seen in my life. the back said... well that is my secret. : ) goodnight.
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 4:58 AM [+] ::
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shane and i took danbaz to palermos in los feliz village for our lunch date. we all had soo much pasta and garlic bread!!! i hadn't been there in a while, maybe since i went w/ mike last fall! after that we went to amoeba and spent too much money. i never get a basket to avoid buying more than one cd. but today i left with four, one of which was a double. but most weren't for me. i don't feel so guilty buying music for other people. this time i got two beatles cds for my dad (abbey road and let it be) cuz every time i am in his car he has one of the three cds i have bought him playing. and he mentioned wanting more of the later beatles stuff. then we hunted down a blockbuster w/ the video shane needed to rent, and danbaz and i bought lots of candy. he's one of the few people i know who loves jujyfruits as much as i.
i have a lot to do tonight, i didn't mean to stay out so long. didn't help that i woke up late. i am kinda getting bummed that i haven't received another special email lately but i am feeling so much better that i can kinda distract myself w/ other stuff and stay optimistic. i guess my overall optimism has returned, which could be bad cuz that means i'll have to give myself another reality check in the near future. but i'll enjoy it while i can!
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 8:53 PM [+] ::
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woops, almost forgot, my registration is TOMORROW MORNING bright and early!!! argh...
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 3:58 PM [+] ::
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yesterday my sister called while i was at springfest. she was checking to make sure i'd gotten everyone's plane tickets for may. i hadn't cuz no one had confirmed. i wasn't about to put $800 on my card for no reason! anyhow, she confirmed and i decided to get the tickets and they'd all just have to find themselves a way to the airport! : P
my sister wants me to move home for the summer. she is getting 'separated'. she wasn't really married legally but she has been with her boyfriend for almost five years now? they have a son together, my nephew elijah, and he is 3 in june. and they've lived together since i left town basically. i feel really bad saying now, but i kinda had things planned out (or nearly planned out) for living in LA this summer. i could even stay at my dad's. what would i do in BELLINGHAM? i know some people up there but it would definitely be weird, and i dont think i could get work as anything more than a waitress. and i'm clumsy, see how that would be disasterous? at least i make good tips. eh i don't wanna consider waitressing anymore. but i still feel bad for not being there for her i guess. i just can't be in twenty places at once, sarah, gilu, roxanna, rachel, a'ndrea - everyone wants me to visit. but i want to do some crazy adventurous stuff before i have to grow up. i used to be really responsible. until february. i just blew a fuse i think. no more full time work at anywhere below $10/hr. no way, jose. ok time to take dan to his one week celebratory lunch. this time change really screwed up my day! i slept til almost 3pm!
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 3:24 PM [+] ::
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tonight was kinda exhausting. i will have no problem falling asleep as soon as i get myself into bed. i love pajamas. so a huge group of us went party hopping tonight. first was monmouth, where it seemed like no one really wanted to stay, but i kinda wanted to. but my curiousity got the best of me so i went along w/ the migration. then i went on to another monmouth party, where these guys were playing some cool experimental music. two french guys gave me wine. it was nice. then on to regal t. i had only heard about that from one person but it was going off as we passed by. so we stayed there for a bit and danced some and ran into more people. there were actually two parties there. heffe showed up surprisingly! then onto annenburg, which was broken up by a dps officer throwing the door open like it was a meth lab. that sucked. so back to regal t. that music got shut off. so bad to monmouth. i had fun but this was a long day as it was and so much walking wore me down. so then four of us went to chano's (stupid chanos didn't realize that it was daylight savings and i think they are still open now past 4am!!!). i saw so many people i can't even begin to name them off, it was just like a huge family reunion. friends make me happy.
tomorrow shane and i are taking dan to lunch for his one week anniversary without nicotine. yay dan!
: )
:: meggy spilled the "beans" at 4:19 AM [+] ::
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